Are you a good decision maker?
If you are unsure of the answer, think about your life right now.
Has your life so far turned out to be the way you had expected?
Chances are not everything is rainbows and unicorns, right?
You probably made some silly mistakes you’re paying for right now.
Whether it’s an impulsive buy or getting into a wrong career, some choices can be more costly than others.
The good news is with each day comes a new opportunity.
We have every chance to turn things around and fill our life with happiness and fulfilment.
Below are 4 ways that can help you do just that.
The Pros and Cons
This is an excellent way of choosing a path when you are uncertain.
For example, you’re at the crossroad of choosing a career and can’t make up your mind.
Grab a notebook and pen. Draw a vertical line in the middle.
On the left, write down the pros of the prospect of a new career. On the right, the cons of it.
The side with a longer list wins!
After my online retail business had failed, I thought hard whether I should return to a job market or attempt on a new business idea.
Under the pros of finding a job were 3 neat persuasive arguments.
On the other side, I had 5.
I knew I could add more to 5 so it was an easy decision to make.
When you decide, burn the bridge.
Don’t go back to “what if…”s.
It’s a waste of time and energy.
Give your all energy and attention to the choice you’ve made.
It’s all or nothing for me.
Choosing a Partner
If you dream about having an ideal romantic partner, here’s the best way to go about.
No, it isn’t about signing up for Tinder or OkCupid.
Not yet anyway. ha.
Grab a piece of paper.
Write down all the quality you want from him or her.
Avoid Brad Pitt like or Scarlett Johansson like, if you can.
Perhaps you’d like your prospective partner to be compassionate, kind, generous, supportive, loving, positive, trusty, educated …
The list goes on… to your heart’s desire.
When you’re done, read through your list.
Now decide to be that person yourself.
The person who has all the qualities you just wrote down.
Each day, make a choice to be and act like the person you desire so that you can attract a like-minded partner.
Already in a relationship?
Choose to be the person you desire from your partner.
Whatever quality you want, show it to her/him first so that your partner mirrors you in return.
Will Your Choice Benefit Your Future Self?
When you’re about to make a choice, include your future self in your decision making.
For example, you might be tempted to drink a half bottle of vodka tonight.
Or splurge on the latest pair of Jimmy Choo.
Or waste half of the day procrastinating things that need to be done.
Will your future self’s life get better tomorrow, next week, next month or next year as a result of your choice today?
When you consider your future self in every decision you make today, you’ll be less reckless with the resources you have e.g money and time.
Your life isn’t just your own.
Every choice you make today affects your future self.
Look after that person by making a good choice that’ll benefit her/him i.e use time wisely and save up money for her/him.
Live life that your future self will thank you for.
Ask Open Questions
If you’re stuck with life, not making progress, it might be because you’re doing things on autopilot.
It’s time to put a stop to the habitual doing that doesn’t produce the desired result.
Ask yourself open questions.
According to the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, in one study, volunteers were to take a handwriting test for 10 anagrams.
At the start, some were asked to write “Will I” and others “I Will”.
And those who had written “Will I” solved nearly twice as many anagrams as those who wrote “I Will”.
You likely say “I Will” when assessing your goals and progress:
I’ve got to achieve this goal.
I will try harder.
The problem with “I will” in decision making is that you’re still in the automatic thinking loop.
You do the same thing only harder and face the same dismal result!
Put a hold on your automatic thinking and allow yourself to examine your situations from a different angle.
You can achieve this by asking open questions.
Talk to yourself loudly.
Ask for advice.
Here are examples of open questions:
What caused me to fail to reach the expected goal?
What stopped me from making xx amount of money I had aimed at?
How could I make this work?
Open questions will enable you to see things from different angles and attempt things you haven’t tried before.
No matter how much burden you’re under from the past choices, with each day, you have a great chance to make your tomorrow better and greater.
Making a good choice every day can be done by:
- Taking a simple exercise of writing down the pros and cons of choices.
- Striving to become the person of personal traits you want from your potential partner or friends.
- Including your future self’s welfare in today’s decision making.
- Asking open questions to yourself.
You’ll surely turn the tide around and create a happier, healthier and richer life.
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