Have you ever wondered how people like David Goggins develop what seems like impossible mental toughness?
I’m always fascinated by how far some people seem to push themselves and stretch their limit.
A friend of mine who suffered extreme hardship once told me:
We’re much stronger than we think. We’re much resilient than we think.
Although there’re common traits among the mentally strong, I realised that being mentally strong is a by-product of the decision they made.
It all started with a single decision.
David Goggins didn’t start out to become mentally tough. There was no prize for him being mentally strong per se.
When he decided to run his first long-distance running to raise money for charity, he faced one of the toughest endurance tests.
That’s when he experienced how far he could push himself.
Seth Godin said he decided a long time ago what he would work for free and what he wouldn’t work for free.
According to him, that one decision saved him tons of time.
He knew when to say “Yes or No” without wasting time thinking about it.
Here, in his own wise words:
We only have to make a decision once.
– Seth Godin
There’s no compromise. No emotion. No drama.
Sounds So Simple
It sounds simple when he puts it like that, doesn’t it?
I suspect what follows is a great discipline.
We have to fight with all might to resist stuff we said we wouldn’t do, which can be too tempting to resist for a short and quick gain.
Not to mention all the distractions that can take us down the rabbit hole.
You probably said NO to social media one too many times only to be pulled right back into a series of cute cat photos.
So, although they make it sound easy, we know it’s far from being easy.
So much so, a lot of us decide not to make a decision at all.
And here are 4 reasons you may find making a decision hard.
4 Reasons You’re Indecisive and Can’t Make Up Your Mind
1. You Have No Goal, Have Too Many Goals or…
Your goal is actually a dream.
It’s important we distinguish between a goal and a dream.
I fantasise about playing Fur Elise at Royal Albert Hall. It’s a dream. I know it’s never going to happen.
I’m not being pessimistic, but realistic.
If your goal is your dream, which is unrealistic, you won’t make a decision because deep down you know it’s a fantasy.
Having too many goals creates hesitation, too.
You struggle to choose one goal to commit so you remain indecisive forever.
2. Your Fear and Uncertainty
Your logical mind knows that when you decide a goal and work towards it, you can achieve it, but your fear and uncertainty are holding you back.
I can almost hear Tony Robins‘ gravelly voice, shouting:
He talks a great deal about our indecision vs fear and uncertainty.
My life stood standstill as long as I was indecisive. And it was all my doing.
3. You’re Afraid of Responsibility
Responsibility is the price of greatness.
– Winston Churchill
It feels safer if you let others make a decision for you.
After all, if things go wrong, you won’t be blamed.
There could also be a deeper cause of avoiding responsibility.
You might suffer from low confidence and low self-esteem: you doubt your own abilities to make the right decision.
Remember my friend said:
We’re much stronger than we think
She wouldn’t have known how much she had in her hadn’t she trusted herself and took responsibility.
By making a decision to take responsibility and face her life challenges head on, she found out she was far more capable than she had believed about herself.
4. You’re Over-analysing
If you’re being indecisive until you gather all the information to make the “right” decision, you end up over-analysing and making a decision of not doing anything about it.
Although you kinda made a decision by not making a decision, you have changed nothing to improve your life.
Most of the time, we just need to dive in with self-belief.
Incidentally, that’s what my 100 Day Challenge is about!
The best cure to all of you who are struggling with being indecisive is to make one decision and be done with it.
The moment you make a decision, leave it be.
Don’t allow your ego to interfere with the decision. There’s no room for doubt, laziness or overthinking.
There’s no “should I do this today or shouldn’t?” because you already made a decision.
There’s NO debate.
You just get on with the next step towards your goal.
Three gentlemen mentioned here make it sound so easy I almost believe making a decision is that easy.
Or maybe, just maybe, making a decision IS that easy, after all…
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